Goals . Health . Inspiration
5 Strategies for Lasting Change
Helaine Iris © 2004
"Be the change you wish to see." Mahatma Gandhi
In the last issue of Along The Purpose Path I told the story
of a client who's been working to make a change in her life.
She wants to grow her business while at the same time, decrease
her stress
level and increase how much she enjoys herself. She's not alone.
My client's breakthrough began when she made a mental shift
from a state of striving to state of thriving.
What seems to make the difference between those who thrive versus
those who strive comes down to the willingness to identify what
is and isn't working in life; and then making the appropriate
changes. Yet, studies indicate that most - over three-quarters
of us -
fail to follow through on the changes we set out to make.
The reality is change is difficult for just about everyone.
Those who do manage to follow though on life changes aren't simply
lucky. Instead, they've mastered the skills to not only make
change easier, but also to make their changes sustainable over
time.
It's a cliché that bears repeating. Rome wasn't built
in a day. Change happens one step at a time. The most effective
change a person can make is when it's taken in small increments.
People
often get stopped because they don't shift their focus from the
big
picture long enough to effectively plan. When you don't have
a solid plan, and support for your plan, it's easy to get bumped
off course and become disillusioned.
The good news is every time you successfully implement a change,
small or large, your life gets better. Success builds new evidence
that change is possible. It spreads confidence and a sense
of achievement throughout your life.
It's New Years Resolution season. It seems there's something
magical about new beginnings that inspires most of us to reexamine
our
lives, renew our commitment to a goal or resolve to make
changes.
Some of us aim even higher toward a complete reinvention of our
selves.
As a Coach, I earn my living by helping people make changes
in their personal and professional lives. So it won't surprise
you to hear me suggest these five strategies you can begin using
to
make changes, stop striving and begin thriving in the year ahead.
1. Identify the "gap"
A "gap" represents the difference between where you
are currently and where you want to be. An example of a gap might
be: I want to be exercising regularly but I'm currently not exercising
at
all. Or I want to start my own home business and I'm currently
employed.
There can be small gaps or there can be big gaps.
Having the life you want is really a matter of identifying and
closing your gaps. This perspective can reduce the feelings of
overwhelm. Instead of looking at life as one huge problem,
you begin to see a series of gaps that needs filling one at
a time.
Once you identify your gaps, you have a road map to follow.
2. Reveal and disqualify the disempowering beliefs that energize
your gap
Now that you have identified your gaps you can begin to close
them.
At the heart of every gap is an underlying belief or story that
is limiting. It's necessary to flush out these disempowering
beliefs that may get in your way of closing the gap. Usually,
these beliefs
are transparent to us, and we aren't aware of how powerfully
and pervasively they operate to control our choices. When you
shine the light of awareness on these beliefs, they're neutralized,
and
you're able to make more empowered choices in closing your
gap.
Let's play with examples. What might be a disempowering belief
behind my exercise example? What thoughts or stories might be
transparently shaping your inability to stick to an exercise
program?
I can't follow through anything
Exercise is hard and I hate it
There's not enough time
Once the limiting thought is revealed, now what?
3. Build a positive case for yourself
After revealing the belief, it's important that you find out
what's true about you and your life. You need to inquire to discover
if your beliefs are real obstacles or if they're just a product
of old thought patterns.
Go back to the exercise example. "I don't follow through
on anything." Is that true? Can you find examples of where
you have followed through on something? If so, make a list that
disqualifies this particular belief.
This process will help you build a more positive case for your
own success, and when you notice yourself slipping into the old
thought pattern, you can shift to what's true something more
true and
much more positive. It's really a matter of building new thinking
habits and practicing them.
When you get to the truth, you feel better. In the example,
all the energy tied up in resisting exercise can now go into
exercising.
4. Make a plan and take action
Here's where the rubber meets the road. All the inspiration
and awareness will only go so far. Who hasn't had the experience
where you get inspired about something and go off to accomplish
it only to lose steam and give up on your dream or project?
That's where having a solid plan comes in, an action plan. Write
out the steps of your plan. Be specific.
An important part of designing a successful action plan is building
an accountability structure. When you're accountable to specifics
or someone else you have a better chance of following through
with what you say you want.
This brings us to the last step.
5. Create a circle of support
We all need support. Often the difference between getting successful
results and not, depends on how well supported you are.
I was just working with a client who wanted to introduce a new
routine into her life. She questioned her ability to stick to
it.
When I asked her what in the past helped her stay on track with
something new she said, "Telling someone my plan made me
more
accountable. By speaking my intention out loud made it harder
to
just blow it off". Then I asked her whom she would tell
about her
new plan. She decided to tell her husband and use him for her
accountability. You could take it a step further and ask the
person
to periodically check in with you how you are doing with your
commitment. Now, that's support.
A circle of support can mean a lot of different things. It can
be
your partner, your best friend, colleagues at work, or your family.
Meaningful support can be any or all of these people, the more
support you have the better. The only critical distinction is
that
you are supported for YOUR agenda, not the supporters.
Establishing and calling on your "circle of support" will
help you
sustain yourself through all of life through challenging times
and
through great times.
Why not give this strategy a try. Begin to thrive in your life.
I'd
love to hear your thoughts, feedback and successes. Email me
at
mailto:helaine@pathofpurpose.com
It's YOUR life…imagine the possibilities!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Helaine Iris is a certified Life Coach, writer and teacher that
loves her life. She works with individuals, and self-employed
professionals, who want to thrive in their business while crafting
a
life that's in absolute alignment with their highest ideals,
deepest
values and gracefully masters the complexities of modern living.
For a solution focused complimentary session visit her website
http://www.pathofpurpose.com or call her 603-357-8546 or email
her
helaine@pathofpurpose.com
|