nightmares of our own

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naynay
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nightmares of our own

Post by naynay » Tue Mar 08, 2005 12:32 am

I read your about your pressing projects Mauveduh and while I have felt those pressures and worries in my life...I have a different sort of pressures myslef...however, I am sure glad I am not walking in your shoes, as I have tremendous compassion for your situation.

One of my oldest, dearest best friend and lover recently died with a sudden unexpected death. It wasn't like a tragic auto accident or a freak work-related accident..nor even a heart attack, stroke or brain hemmorage. All of those can take our loved ones away within seconds.

Although the shock and disbelief of his death were the same as if any of the above mentioned happened. His wife couldn't wake him and he was in some level of a coma. He had a seizure at the hospital and who knows if he had such during the night...but the end result was he was framing a 25 million dollar home the day before, and the next morning he was admitted into the hospital unconcious and showing no brain activity whatsoever. Why and how? What happened?

This man was a tri-athlete, non-stop mover and shaker. When I lived with him there was never to be barely a moment where you had down time. It was "chop, chop, chop...let's go people!" He had more energy and drive than anyone I have ever known. He utilized every single minute of the day in such an efficient manner. He had such a passion for life and he completely savored every single moment he could.

We were the best of friends and eventually we lived togahter with such intense passion and love. "Lazy" was not part of this man's vocabulary. He was a tough one to keep ahead of.

We both went on our various path's, however, our lives connected and intersected every so often. The night he went into this seizure and coma, I had one of the most intense and "hard to believe its a dream", dream about him. I have had them for many a years, but this one was indeed one of the strongest and rattling dreams ever before.

When people you love die suddenly, it seems that if you listen or are aware enough...there are so many little signs or symbols or what ever the freak they are...that suddenly seem to relate or have some significance. These sort of odd occurences have happenend to me (especially when my mother died) yet all you can do is say.."wow, that was weird, or "Oh my God," I just had the weirdest dream, or I had a feeling something was wrong...etc.etc.
Tis, true, as such things have gone on with me concerning this friends death.

I usually like to read to escape or obtain my entertainment. Tonight I was flicking thru channels and "Will and Grace" was on re-run. I get such a kick out of those two. They had a conversation that I swear I had with this man..verbatim.

I switched channels again, and it is Ellen Degeneres show (probably from the earlier broadcast I am sure) and this character actor comes on...I can't remember his name, but I remember he played in "The Cuckcoo's Nest" as one of the "crazy" dudes. Anyhow, she complimented him on something or other and he said, "yea, you to me." Whoa!!

Okay probably no biggie to many, but this man friend of mine who just died would forever and always say or reply back to me..."you to me." In other words I would say, "I Love You," and he would reply "You to me." Meaning of course, so do I. It use to sort of bug me because I had to settle for that answer when what I wanted him to really say was..."Oh, I love you too, or "I love you even more,"....get my drift.

Eventually, "you to me" became the most endearing term, because it was his way. A man who didn't find it easy to express or open himself up very easily. That term came to be the most endearing and loving pieces of words that I have or likely will ever hear.

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Mauveduh
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Post by Mauveduh » Wed Mar 09, 2005 8:11 pm

naynay,

That was a moving story and I feel for you, having recently lost a friend. You are obviously trying to come to terms with his passing and make sense of something so senseless. They say our dreams are where we try to work out issues that we can't in our waking hours.

When it's so unexpected, it's really hard to accept.

Maybe he is trying to contact you or send a message. Just a thought.

-M
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You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.--Mark Twain

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Johntan
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Re: nightmares of our own

Post by Johntan » Mon Dec 02, 2013 6:18 pm

Yes, a good story. Sorry for your friend. I have lost a good friend this year too and we would always hang out after work. I still think about him all the time.

Melaniatef
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nightmares of our own

Post by Melaniatef » Sat Aug 04, 2018 8:42 pm

Hi Lisa and welcome to our site.
Lovely to hear your story and look forward to pictures of George. Have a lovely holiday, Dorset is gorgeous.

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